Perspective

The photo on the left is the view from my hotel room in Bali. On the right is the view from my hospital bed a couple weeks later.

Life can change in an instant. We all know this rationally, but few of us really take in that message, myself included. Sure, when young, talented, famous people die, we’re shocked. We think, ‘Wow, if HE (or she/they) can die so young and in the prime of his life, then of course a lesser human being, (me) absolutely could.’ And it scares us and gives us pause for a day or two. We may hold each other a little tighter for a minute. But that fades quickly. No, it usually takes something that hits even closer to home like losing a loved one unexpectedly, getting a bad diagnosis, or having an accident for it to really hit home.

When I got back from Bali, I somehow developed an abscess and it became badly infected (staph infection). I went to the ER and they admitted me after taking a blood test and seeing that my inflammation markers were really high. I was there for a week. I’m healing now thankfully but it was pretty scary there for a few days. I’m just sharing because I want to remind people how fragile life is. There’s a meme that says, ‘ The problem is, you think you have time.’ And I don’t think its meant to say, YOU DON’T HAVE ANY TIME YOU’RE GONNA DIE SOON! but I think its saying, time goes by so quickly. we are distracted and busy with our jobs, our to-do lists, etc, and we forget to take time to do the things we really love, or tell people how we feel. It would be tragic if your life or that of someone you love came to an end suddenly and you didn’t share how you felt. Don’t let that happen. Be vulnerable, risk feeling stupid; it’s hard but its worth it. You will never have to think, ‘if only I had done or said x…’

Shoutout to my mom

I want to give a little shoutout to my mama.  We’ve had our differences over the years, like any mother and daughter, but I can honestly say she’s one of the most thoughtful people I know. And woefully under-celebrated for it. One small example: if you mention you like something, even in passing, she’ll put it in her memory bank for later.  She’ll notice what chocolate you eat when you’re home and mail it halfway around the world, wrapped, for Christmas.  My mother has never forgotten a birthday or an anniversary or overlooked an important date. (The woman’s got a memory of an elephant. Unless you’ve wronged her—in that case she lets it go). She sends more cards for these events than anyone I know: even to people she doesn’t know that well or who have abused her and my father’s kindness. 

With her church group, Peg hand-knits shawls for people who are sick or grieving. My grandmother used  to call her the power behind the throne, (my father being the king) and she wasn’t kidding.  I think even Dad  would agree (to a point) that that’s a fairly accurate statement, or at least not inaccurate.  Hers is a quiet power. 

Probably no one would accuse her of being touchy feeling or lovey dovey. My first boyfriend still jokes about how, after years of us dating, she still signed her cards to him, ‘Fondly, Peg.’ As mentioned, her caring nature is more quiet; backed up by actions instead of little nicknames or endearing monikers, for which she has little patience. (I may have gotten that from her.) 

My mother is extremely humble and probably would never want me to post her picture here, but I just wanted to show my appreciation, because unfortunately it’s rare that I do. Love you Mom! Thank you for all you do, for me and so many others.

A Few Ways to Instantly Raise Your Vibe

Feeling down?  Here are some ways to instantly raise your vibe.  If it’s more than just a blah moment, you may just have to feel it to heal it.  Give yourself time, and then when you’re ready, try one of these instant mood boosters.  Or do something that lights YOU up, whatever that may be.

A short true story

When my grandparents were younger, they didn’t have a lot of money and so my gram worked a lot of different jobs while my grandfather was working his main job. They were busy so didn’t see that much of each other. But every night after dinner, they’d stand side-by-side at the sink and wash the dishes together. She’d wash and he’d dry, and sometimes they’d alternate. Later when these crazy, newfangled machines called ‘dishwashers’ were becoming more common, she proudly announced that she was going to buy the family a new one. This would be a big expense, but she somehow always managed to get by, invoking the phrase, ‘the lord shall provide.’ She was the matriarch of the house. there was no need for a patriarch. My grandfather didn’t have much say in that household. My grandmother used to tell me she always got her way (and I witnessed it often myself) but only because my grandfather was so kind and gentle.

But this time he shocked her—he overrode the idea, saying that their after-dinner cleaning time was special to him, and they would NOT be getting a dishwasher thank you very much. She had no idea until that moment how much it had meant to him.

Their household remained dishwasher-free for the next 20 years, when they moved into a house that, for good or bad, already had one. ❤️